#4 Adulthood anyone?

Alhamdulillah.

So today (11/12/2014) I turned 19 years old! It's quite late, I know. Well, lucky you who have your birthday early. Frankly speaking (or typing), I am not so excited for this year's birthday.

SAY WHAT!

The reason is, obviously, I'm getting older. But still a cutie pie. Next year I'll be 20 years old, exiting my flowery teenagers life and entering scary adulthood. How am I going to survive?

But! Hehehehehehehe. I am so excited to be an adult. Skip those bills, taxes, loans and all. I don't know whether am I the only one who feel this way. I can't wait to finally live in my own house, decorate it, and stay in it. I don't mind if it's going to be small but as long as it is cozy and feels like home, I'll be truly happy. To have my own car is one more thing. A car that comes from my own pocket. The car that I buy with my efforts. Again, if it's small and inexpensive, I'll be okay. Truly okay. If nothing comes in my way, I want to have a house and a car before I turn 27. Amin ya Allah!

(But please, I want Mitsubishi Mirage)
Duh. Stop judging.

Wait. I know what's in your mind (I actually don't) What about getting married and have my own family? Yes, it is in my wishlist. But for now, I'm focusing on my studies and completing my diploma. Not so long ago, I've promised myself to get married before my mother turns 65. She is now 60. So that means I have to be someone's wife at the age of 24. What.

Then, I convince myself when the right time comes, I'll think about having a family. Now is the time for me to make my mother proud. "Don't get married right away, but get married the right way" says Aiman Azlan.

But I can only plan. He is the one who writes every single second of my life. There will always be a reason behind what is happening in my life either sweet or bitter. He knows what's best for me. In the end, He only wants the best for me. I know. And I accept it wholeheartedly. I put my trust on Him.

Sorry for the long post.
My fingers are trying to build muscles tonight (lame!)

By the way, I already have my long-term goals written. What about you?

#3 My heaven

Not like the others, I was not born to a perfect family.

Out of 5 siblings, I am the last (and cutest, kindest, coolest, you name it) one. My mother is a single mother, living her life to the fullest and making her dreams come true. Cliche as it seems, but my mother is my life inspiration, my idol and my reason for everything I do. Being a strong woman, she overcame every barricades in her life and now I can say that she's happy with what she currently have.

My mother's previous life was neither easy nor pretty. She had gone through things that I could never imagine of. She married a man about 35 years ago and gave birth to 4 children. And they were my annoying brothers and sisters. When she thought everything was perfect for her, she went into a situation where no woman in this world wants to be in. She got divorced.

And few years later, she met my father. And gave birth to an awesome angel. Which happened to be me! And again, life tested her with another divorcement. I can say that this time, she suffered a lot of 'pain'. As far that I knew, my father left me when I was still an infant. He went to Philippines and never came back since.

We never talked about him anymore. Not once.

My mother then raised her 5 children with her own pair of hands. She educated us, fed us, treated us, sheltered us with her endless love. Many years later, her sweat and tears paid off. Her children grew up to be successful and well-educated.

I didn't know much about her life before I was born as we rarely talked about it. But one thing I surely knew was my mother, Normah bt Ibrahim was a very strong woman with a big heart. Her warm smile could brighten up my gloomy days.

But what if one day I lose that smile? I lost my father's. 
I don't want to lose hers.